Wednesday, October 7, 2009

Feeling the Need for Someone to Dance With

Contentedly single for almost two years now, I occasionally have those moods, you know the ones, when for a moment in time, you want the exact opposite of what you have. Although I am still firmly entrenched in my distrust of the majority of the male species due to several bad past experiences with them, and the fact that those I still see as the Very few remaining good ones in Alaska are either taken or uninterested, I occasionally feel I miss the companionship.

I, myself, am a terrible dancer. Give me figure skates, and teach me the steps, and apparently I can make art of it upon the ice, but off...I am a complete Queen Clutz. However, sometimes, as now in the middle of studying frantically before having to return to work, (I blame the music of the moment, "Nothing's Wrong" by Catherine Scholz & "Dance With Me Daily" by the Barra McNeils) I am overcome by a gentle longing to have someone dance me gracefully around a room.

Having a fascination, and sometimes feeling I belong in the times, of many things Victorian (the age of and following Jane Austen's time) my imagination gets away from me at times until the moment ends and here I am, back in this plodding century of nothing particularly noteable.

Tuesday, October 6, 2009

Silly American Language

Extraordinary......extra ordinary.

Written together it indicates something out of the ordinary, super special, extra strange; and written out in its individual means ordinary as can be, ordinary to the point where it can't be any More so ordinary....

We silly Americans.

Realization of Appreciation

Sadly, I have to say that there are people and events in my life that I take for granted; until, that is, someone or something wakes me up to just how special they really are.

I am lucky enough to have some very wonderful people in my life. I have family that is just fantastic in their love and wildness, and friends who are honest, and true to themselves, and all of them have helped me to realize who I am, who I want to be, and to learn to accept and even like being who I am.

There are impatient people in this world, people who huff and puff and complain their way through the day. Everyone has met at least one, has dealt with at least one. I have walked away from mine with eyes suddenly opened to how much I truly do appreciate my family and friends. I appreciate that they aren't drama queens so much as clowns; I have learned to love their intelligence, especially when it surpasses my own and they are willing to teach me; I love their natural ability to keep me smiling and laughing and how they are able to see the good in everything, a positive, a small dash of fun in all that happens, no matter how horrendous.

I think it goes unsaid so very often, too often, by all of us, just how much these people in our lives, the ones who make it better and worth every unpleasant encounter and task we must do, are appreciated. I only wish I knew how to adequately express it, what their deepest wish is, the one that if I knew I could make come true. Instead, all I can do is to offer up the occasional and un-encompassing, inadequate word here or there, to tell them, when I remember, that I do appreciate who they are and that they are in my life.

Oh how I only wish I could give them the world....and so much more.